Blame, judgments, and projections—oh my! I’m going to circle back to something that I shared a couple of posts back because it’s incredibly important for you to understand: How you relate to the issue IS the issue. (Read that again.)
An unresolved issue or trigger is anything that disturbs your peace. While uncomfortable, issues aren’t inherently bad. They’re simply life’s red flags to show you where you need to spend some time healing. If unresolved issues didn’t feel uncomfortable you wouldn’t know to pay attention to them or do anything about them.
Most people are willing to do ANYTHING to avoid feelings of discomfort, so we let our ego step in with blame, judgments, and projections to make our issues someone else’s problem. But the truth will always remain...nothing outside of you truly causes your disturbances.
Consider the thoughts in the graphic pictured here. There are hurtful thoughts which come from your ego (blame, judgments, projections) and there are helpful thoughts which come from your loving essence (acceptance, compassion, trust).
“This is their fault” is coming from a place of blame, whereas “This is my perspective” comes from a place of ownership.
“I should be past this” is coming from a place of self-judgment, whereas “I’m working on this” comes from a place of self-compassion.
And so on.
Is there an unresolved issue or current trigger in your life that, if you dropped the “hurtful” thought and adopted the “helpful” thought would help bring you peace? Try it on for size. Even if you don’t believe in what I’m explaining here, just see what it would feel like for 5 minutes to sit with a different perspective.
Do you feel a shift?